Lately I’ve been reading Executive Functioning Workbook for Teens, Ages 13–18 by A. E. Nicholls. One exercise that jumped out at me is the Cognitive Flexibility Challenge: Perspective Shift Puzzle. The idea is simple but powerful: when you hit a stressful situation, don’t lock into the first explanation your brain gives you. Instead, come up with a few different ways of looking at it and notice how each one changes how you feel and what you do next.
Why this matters: cognitive flexibility is an executive functioning skill that helps you switch gears mentally, spot options, and avoid the trap of all-or-nothing thinking. When school gets overwhelming, this skill can stop the spiral and point you toward a plan.
The scenario
Let’s imagine this: you work hard on a big project and end up with a lower grade than you expected. Most of us would feel crushed at first—“All that effort for nothing?” That’s exactly the kind of moment where the Perspective Shift Puzzle comes in.
At first you might realize your effort didn’t match what the teacher was actually grading for. Maybe you spent hours making the project look polished, but the rubric gave more weight to analysis and research depth. Seeing it this way shifts the feeling from frustration to curiosity. Instead of, “I’m bad at this,” it becomes, “How can I better match my work to the rubric next time?”
Another way to frame it is remembering that one grade doesn’t erase the skills you built along the way. Even if the number isn’t what you hoped, you still learned to organize sources, meet deadlines, or collaborate with a partner. This perspective lowers the panic and makes the grade feel less like failure and more like one step in a bigger process.
And sometimes the explanation is even wider: outside factors may have mattered. Maybe the deadline was packed in with other classes, or you went into the presentation without much sleep. Acknowledging this isn’t an excuse. It’s a reminder that your routines and energy levels can affect performance just as much as raw effort.
If you’re struggling to come up with different explanations on your own, you can even try typing into ChatGPT: “I worked really hard on a school project but got a lower grade than I expected. Give me three possible reasons this happened, with one next step for each.” AI won’t replace your judgment, but it can nudge you toward fresh ways of looking at the problem.
What changes
Instead of staying stuck in “All that work was wasted,” the puzzle reframes the story. One lens gives you a practical fix. Another lowers the panic by highlighting real skills learned. A third shows you that outside factors matter too, which helps you treat yourself with more compassion. Suddenly, you move from feeling defeated to feeling like someone with options.
A challenge for you
Try the Perspective Shift Puzzle yourself:
- Write down a stressful scenario in one sentence.
- Push yourself to find two or three different explanations.
- Notice how each one changes your feelings and next steps.
- Share them with a parent or friend and see which feels most helpful.
And if you get stuck, remember you can always ask an AI to help you brainstorm perspectives.
Need help finding perspectives?
If you feel stuck, try asking yourself questions like:
- Process check: Did the way I prepared or approached this match what the situation required?
- Zoom out: How much does this single moment really matter in the bigger picture?
- Hidden factors: Were things like sleep, stress, timing, or environment playing a role?
- Other people’s view: How might a teacher, coach, or friend interpret what happened?
- Strength focus: Even if the outcome wasn’t ideal, what skills or progress did I gain?
- What if positive: Is there any way this setback could actually help me improve next time?
These prompts can work for almost any situation: projects, friendships, sports, or leadership challenges.
Final thought
A single grade doesn’t define you. But your response to a setback can. Cognitive flexibility turns “This was all for nothing” into “I’m adjusting and learning.” That shift is where growth—and better results—really happen.
I adapted this scenario from A. E. Nicholls’ Executive Functioning Workbook for Teens, Ages 13–18. I didn’t actually experience this particular situation, but I walked through it as practice. For the full exercise (and many others), see the book.
FOR PARENTS >>>
When your teen comes home with a disappointing grade, resist jumping straight to solutions. Instead, ask: “What are a couple of different reasons this might have happened?” and “Which of those feels most in your control for next time?” Questions like these model cognitive flexibility and shift the focus from self-criticism to problem-solving.
And just like your teen, you can lean on AI for ideas. Try prompting: “My teenager worked hard on a project but got a disappointing grade. Suggest a few possible reasons why this might have happened, and what they could do differently next time.” Reviewing the answers together can spark calmer, more productive conversations.
